10 Ways to NOT Lose your Patience with Your Kids
- June 17, 2016
- by Melissa Lawrence
I’m going to be honest with you. While my kids may look like little angels on camera when they know they’re being filmed for a vlog, it’s not always a bed of roses at home with five kids. Sure, there are times when I feel my blood start to boil and I know I’m about to yell. And if you know me, you know I am not someone who likes to yell. So ever since my kids were beyond the adorable baby stage I’ve been thinking of strategies on how to be patient with kids at home. I hope these general anger management tips will help you, too, the next time you feel your patience slipping away! Also stay tuned for another blog on this topic with a counting technique that has really been working for me lately!
10 Strategies for Controlling Your Temper
- Think : Before yelling something you might regret at your kids and hurting their feelings, it’s best to take a deep breath and think about the situation objectively. As we all know, it is very easy to say things we will regret later on when we’re in the heat of the moment.
- Schedule in free time : Are you spending too much time cooped up in the house doing the same things every day? Monotony and cabin fever can lead to some pretty high tempers. Schedule in fun, care-free activities for you and your family throughout the month to just relax.
- Refuel : Maybe your impatience stems from being hungry and cranky? Grab a healthy pick-me-up like a fresh fruit or veggie to get your energy up.
- Spend time away : Sometimes all you need is to spend a little time away from the situation. Take a shower or a quick nap and return later with a clearer head. Another way to allow yourself to calm down quickly is to sit down and drink a tall glass of water. By the time you are finished, you will have probably calmed down.
- Exercise : Instead of letting the anger boil up inside you, offer to get yourself of the situation with your child and instead go for a brisk walk around the block. You’ll both feel much better and calmer afterwards.
- Reflect : Think about your goals and yourself as a parent. Are you happy with how your child is seeing you handling your emotions? Could you improve upon anything as far as your parenting style goes? These are important questions to reflect on as you explore ways to effectively control your temper.
- See the bigger picture : Think about this for a moment. The next time you’re upset at your child, think if this is a situation that will affect you and your family a year from now. No? Then it’s probably not worth getting too worked up about. And here’s another thing to remember in the moment: your child is exactly that, a CHILD. Don’t expect him to be an adult.
- Refrain from cursing : Children are so emotionally vulnerable, so a “Go to hell” from a parent will hurt them much more deeply than it would from one adult to another. Instead, provide an assertive statement that tells your child what he or she did wrong and why it is wrong or unacceptable. This will allow them to learn from the experience in a more fruitful way.
- Words Hurt : Such examples as name-calling and comparing (“Why can’t you be more like your sister?”) can be just as painful as a slap or hit. Think before you speak, always.
- Never resort to violence : No matter how angry and impatient you may feel, violence is NEVER an option. When your kids see that you can handle your anger in a productive, non-violent way, they will learn from seeing your model behavior and will be less likely to resort to violence in the future.
Any more tips on how to be patient with kids? Comment below with yours! I think in such a high-stress world, we all needs some ways to manage our anger every once in a while, so it’s good we can help each other!