Why Do We Always Have The Same Fights?
- May 15, 2014
- by Melissa Lawrence
Hello, my friends! So I love my husband dearly and we’re coming up on 11 happy years of marriage. Honestly, I wouldn’t say we have any significant marriage problems (thanks Heavens) and we have a pretty peaceful relationship. But like a lot of old married couples, we always have the same fights. In today’s blog, I am describing those fights. (Hopefully, the hubs is busy at work and not watching today!)
Help me out! How can I get out of the rut of having these same fights with the hubs? Share any tips you might have on how to stop fighting with your husband!
Here are some of the classic topics I inevitably end up fighting about with my cherished spouse:
1) The Friday night “I’m so tired” fight. A friend of mine once said “never talk about anything on a Friday night. Don’t even talk.” I am so spent on Friday night that nothing good is coming out of my mouth. So I’m trying to learn how to keep my mouth shut. As someone who mouths off on YouTube weekly and has filmed hundreds of videos, you might glean that this does not come naturally to me!
2) The vacation fight (a good way to continue arguing about money). Here’s how this one goes: I always want to take a vacation, and “some folks” are less inclined. I think I’m good at compromising on a lot of things, but other things not so much and honestly, it’s something I need to work on. It’s much more important to strike a balance than to always get what you want, because in the end nothing is more important than your marriage or partnership and your family and close relationships.
There’s one other classic fight we ALWAYS have that I’m working on, but to find out about that one, you’ll have to watch my video. Gotcha!
What do you guys fight about with your spouses or partners? Weigh in and help me out! Share any tips you have on how to stop arguing with your spouse!
Gracias!
xo Melissa
Comments
Leslie
HI Melissa! found your blog through scarymommy.com. My husband and I used to have the nap fight all the time! He works part time and goes to school full time while I stay at home with our (almost)2 yr old son. He would come home, say hi, maybe have a snack, and then lay down for 20 minutes to an hour. occasionally longer. and then he’d have to study the rest of the day. And I’m alone with the kiddo. again. Every. Single. Day. For a while, i resented him for it, but I kept telling myself, ‘hes working his a$$ off so that we can stay home, keep your mouth shut’ … and then “but why does he get all day with no baby and then still needs a break?! wth? I can’t wait til..blah blah blah.” It took some time, but I finally got to a point where told myself “Look, it’s not going to be like this forever, but it’s not going to change any time soon, so stop fighting it. He obviously needs the rest. Remember just how horribly stressful and exhausting college was WITHOUT a spouse and child to worry about and support, and give him a break. It’ll be better in a few years. Stop wishing your life away,and just take it one day at a time. You’ll be there before you know it. “