5 Ways Mayer’s Nursery Won’t Be Like Mine

While Yahoo’s moms won’t be slacking off at home anymore, news reports leaked out this week that Marissa Mayer is building herself a swank new office nursery.  Ouch, that’s bad PR, Yahoo.  Wonder if SNL will pick this baby up?  I hope I can stay awake tonight long enough to see.

Marissa Mayer's NurseryPin for later!

Some people are anxious to see what Mayer’s fancy new executive nursery will look like!  Who knows!  Don’t think she’ll be inviting in HGTV.

Contrary to Mayer, I’ve worked from my home nursery nearly every day over the past several years since I film my Cloudmom videos there.  You see, I work from home and from my nursery!  Meanwhile, my nursery bears testament to the five babies who have lived there too – three boys, two girls — and to a busy mother’s benign neglect.

So, although I love and feel grateful for my nursery and the moments I’ve spent there, I can say for sure what Mayer’s nursery WON’T look like.

Here are 5 ways in which Mayer’s nursery won’t be like mine.

1)   Her nursing chair won’t be torn and stained with milk. I’ve spent literally thousands of hours in this chair nursing babies and reading to kids, and working from the laptop and iPhone (yes, working!) , you can see the wear and tear.  My babies also burped all over the chair so though I’ve tried to keep it clean, you can unfortunately see those stain remnants.  Lovely!

torn nursing chair

2)   Her wall paint and crib sheets will be for the same gender.  My first three kids were boys, my last two were girls.  By the time the girls rolled around, I was too exhausted to think about painting the walls pink, and too cheap.  All I could handle was buying a pink sheet.  So the walls remain blue, oh and littered with pinholes from pictures that have been moved.


3)   Her picture frames will contain pictures of her actual baby.  I did manage to get a picture or two into a frame with my first three kids (you can see my third, Beckett, below), but that initiative ended by baby number 3.  When Marielle was born two years ago, my friend Dawn gave me this pink frame.  Dawn’s from Boca thus the bow (sorry, Dawn, and sorry, Boca, I love you both).  The bowed, pink frame has remained empty ever since.

Breastpump station

4)   Rattles and cups will have actually been gifted to THAT baby.  When my first child was born, he was showered with rattles and cups from friends and family members.  Baby numero 5?  Sorry, honey, people were a bit worn out by that point, who can blame them?  It’s annoying to buy baby presents for someone year in and year out.  So the rattles adorning your nursery’s window sill that you so lovingly bang on the walls and dent, don’t actually belong to you.  Go ahead, say “MINE, MINE” till the cows come home, it won’t change the truth.

Baby Rattles

5)   She won’t have a side table from the street.  In NYC, people sometimes put their furniture out on the street because they don’t want to deal with hauling it to the dump.  So sometime before we married, my husband adopted this nifty side table.  I’ve since used it to house my breastpump, endless cups of coffee and hot chocolate, and my kids now enjoy it as a fun place to jump from (hopefully, not onto their baby sister).  The wood’s chipped and too dark to match the lighter wood of the nursing chair, as you can see below.  I don’t don’t think this side table will be on Marissa’s buying list.

side table

So there you go folks, isn’t your curiosity satisfied?  I doubt Yahoo will be providing a picture show of Mayer’s nursery, but at least you’ve seen one of mine.

Love, Me