Setting Boundaries in Public
- September 11, 2014
- by Melissa Lawrence
Hi guys! So lately my biggest problems are happening at the dining table, where getting my brood to sit and eat calmly and politely is a Herculean task. This drives me crazy, but at least I have the liberty to speak to my children and discipline them if need by as I see fit. This includes removing one from the table — happened yesterday during Sunday lunch — and imposing additional dishwashing duties, which suits me just fine!!
One mom recently went through something quite different. Her daughter threw a huge fit in public, and a stranger came up and consoled her daughter. Then, the stranger offered candy to her daughter. Excuse me, but WWHHAAAATTT?
This conundrum is the subject of today’s video. What is your response to what this stranger did?
Um, I say “no way, Lady”! As long as the safety and wellness of a child is not at risk, I think it is up to each of us as parents to try to discipline our children as best we can. Having strangers intervene can only confuse the child and undermine the parent, making her job even more difficult.
Mamma, this has been an issue for me too, and I’ve filmed videos in the past on how to handle temper tantrums in public, which to me is one of the greatest parenting challenges because it’s just so, well, humiliating. It’s like wearing a sign “I’m a Mom, and I Suck.” I’ve seen it all: the raised eyebrows, the frowns, the shaking heads. To an outsider, your child’s fit can look and seem very inappropriate.
But listen up strangers, lest you’ve forgotten, tantrums are part of being of a kid. Every kid has them, and if you start to intervene and try to make my kid feel better, you are making it harder for me to parent my child and curtail toddler tantrums in the future.
Communicating with children is hard enough, please don’t ask me to communicate with YOU at the same time. So please go read the paper or call a friend or give blood or something but don’t make my family your cause — ha ha! I appreciate that you care and want to help, but you’re making it harder for me to be a better Mom!
For more on what happened to this poor mom and why I think she is SO in the right, watch today’s video. Forgive my little tirade, and thanks so much for watching CloudMom!
xoxo M
Comments
Phyllis Lovell
I understand why this mother feels this way and it may be an effective way to teach your child. BUT why should the rest of us be subjected to a screaming child rolling in the aisles? Would she take that same approach at a funeral, church, nice restaurant, movie theater, etc. Why not at least remove the child from the public place and sit with them in the car until it is over. That would also help teach the child appropriate behavior.